Post Surgery Day 4

Paul day was better.
His heart rate has stabilized.
His oxygen levels a good.
The chest drainage tube has been removed.
They removed the drain from his side which will make it easier for him to get comfortable.
He has also had a couple I.V's removed.
Paul is receiving some liquid nutrition in his J Tube.
He is still struggling to take deep breaths or cough, both are things that have to happen before he can leave ICU.  If all goes weel through the night, he may be able to get up and try walking.

It has been a good day.

Thank you for the continued prayers and well wishes.

Jo

Post Surgery Day 3

Update on Paul

His pain seems to be better controlled today and this evening.

Oxygen level is better, still having some problems with breathing. We are working are taking deep breathes.  

Heart rate is high and docs are having a hard time getting it back to normal sinus rhythm.  We continue to pray for an answer.

Antibiotic started as a precautionary measure.  He was up in a chair all day.  Goal is to prevent pneumonia from setting in the lungs.

Paul will probably be in ICU over the weekend.  I spent last night with my daughter and grandson for a much needed good night's sleep.  I managed a two hour nap this afternoon.  My cousin came in for the weekend to give me a bit of relief from hospital duty. *grin

Thank you all for your prayers and posting comments.  I have shared them all with Paul.

Jo

Let go and let God

Years ago I remember reading a sign that said "Let go and let God.  It isn't always easy, but it's worth it!"

Had a scare this morning.  Paul's heart rate jumped to 212 with an irregular rhythm.  They are monitoring him closely.  It was hard to walk out the room when they were bringing the crash cart.  I trust, I pray and that is all I can do.  Praying for the heart rate to return to normal.   It's been 2 hours and the heart rate continues to be over 140'

Later in life I learned to sign this poem and it has always been one of my favorites....

Let go and let God
As children bring their broken toys with tears for us to mend.
I brought my broken dreams to God, because He was my friend.
But then instead of leaving Himin peace to work alone.
I hung around and tried to help with ways that were my own.
At last I snatched them back and cried " How could you be so slow?"
"My child"  He said "What could I do, you never did let go?"


I am letting go ... And trusting.

Jo

Paul is doing well.  He has quite a few tubes going in and out of his body at the moment, but we knew that would be the case and  expected it, so no surprise. 

Paul  had a rough first night with pain management.  Paul seems to have a resistance  to some opiate based painkillers.  The Anesthesiologist  came to check on him and ordered a different painkiller to be added to his medicinal regime.   It seem to help a little bit and we will monitor this over the next few hours. The nurses are watching his blood pressure.  Paul’s blood pressure has always been on the low side and the painkillers tend to make it go even lower.    Tonight seems better as he is currently sleeping.

 

Paul has three incisions: One on his right side of the back coming down from the should blade area to the underside of his armpit area, the second is approximately 6 inches from the left side of his neck down to the front of his throat and the third is on the abdomen.  He has four drainage tubes.  One at the base of the incision on his back, a left and right one in his abdomen and one from his chest.  He also has the usual Foley and NG tube.  He also has a thoracic Epidural tube going into his spine.   Needless to say, getting him to be comfortable is a chore.

 

He did sit up in the chair this morning and it brought relief to the pain in his back but this increased the pain in his abdomen.  Sitting up is good as it stretches his lungs and allows him to breathe easier.  We are very watchful of his breathing since they had to collapse the right lung for the surgery.  He sat up this afternoon for over two hours and this really has helped with an overall feeling better. 

 

We will know more next week as they should have the pathology reports back from the surrounding tissue and the lymph nodes that were removed.  They will also do a test to see if the connections of the stomach pull up has any leakage.

 

There was a bit of leakage from his J Tube site and this has us both a bit concerned as there hasn't been any since it was placed in March.  The nurses have been told to keep an eye on it and contact the doctors if they see it leaking more. 

 

I am tired and going to try to get some sleep.

 

Thank you all for your prayers and positive energy.

Jo

 

If all goes well, on Monday they will have him swallow a very small amount of liquid to check for leakage.  If there is leakage, they will give the inside connection more time to heal.  If there is no leakage, then they will start him on a liquid diet and increase it to a soft diet.  We should have all the pathology reports back by Monday too!

 

Out of Recovery and in ICU

Paul is out of recovery and in ICU.  He is resting.  Too many tubes, I.V's and suctions.....
Tonight he will sleep and rest so the body can start healing.  He has made it through the obstacle of surgery.

Thank you all for your prayers, positive energy, holding him up and everything else. 

Hugs to all
Jo

Out of surgery

Paul is out of surgery and in recovery.  Surgeon said all went well.
More updates after he is ot of Recovery.
Thank you all for your prayers, positive energy and love.

Jo

Tuesday is here...

Paul is in surgery.  Met with a team of eleven people this morning before surgery.  Surgery will take approximately eight hours.

We  pray and wait......

Jo

Reality .....

What Cancer Cannot Do......

It cannot cripple Love.

It cannot shatter Hope.

It cannot corrode Faith.

It cannot eat away at Peace.

It cannot destroy Confidence.

It cannot kill Friendship

It cannot shut out Memories

It cannot silence Courage.

It cannot quench the Spirit

Here I sit into the wee hours of morning.  Listening to Paul's movements as he sleeps.  Lately, I find myself laying awake just to listen to the sound of his breathing deep into the night.  It is comforting to hear the soothing breath as his body relaxes and rests. Or to hold him close and feel his warmth and smell the scent that is his alone.  But tonight too many thoughts fill my mind.  Too many emotions overtake my senses.  I know that worrying is useless.  This is not worry but something else.  I can't quite put my finger on it.  It is almost an anticipation, an eagerness for the next few weeks to be over so that we can move forward and get this behind us.  It seems like we have been waiting forever for the surgery date to arrive.  Has it only been four months since Paul was diagnosed with this cancer?  It seems like a lifetime ago.  So many hurdles, so many set backs, so much time spent waiting for appointments, and testing, and follow-ups, with this doctor or that doctor.   And now that the date is set, I am scared.  I find myself frightened of all the "What if's" that have been suppressed, hidden, forbidden from taking form.  I have managed to stay strong this far, to clean the wounds, to comfort him when he was at his sickest, to encourage him when he felt his own body betrayed him.  Yet now... I am frightened of him actually going through with this surgery, but on the other hand, I am more frightened of him not having surgery and letting cancer win.

Maybe it's not worry at all, only the effects of  too much late afternoon coffee! 

Hugs,

Jo

Surgery Date is Set

The surgeon's office called today.

We have a surgery date set for Tuesday, June 11, 2013 ... at 7:30 am. 

As I write this the butterflies in my stomach are doing a great job of filling me with anxiety.  I know, it's silly, but it is what it is.  I'm scared now that things are moving forward.  It's funny how you become accustomed to change and then when it needs to change again, it brings up all the  worries you had set aside.  All the "what if's" play in your mind and are hard to push away.

We will be seeing the surgeon as previously scheduled on Thursday, June 6, 2013 and will discuss expectations and foreseeable outcomes.  The usual questions: anticipated length of hospital stay, risks, complications and anything else that pops into our heads before Thursday.

We will be getting things together to take with us to the hospital since this will be a planned stay unlike our previous stay which was completely unexpected.  

We enjoy the journey of life and look forward to continue making memories after this beast is extradited with Paul's esophagus. 

Dinner date

Caverns, Canyons and Rocks, Arizona

Hawaii

England

Rain Forest hiking, Belize

Having fun

A Christmas kiss

A Sultan and his harem girl

On the way to Tortuga National Park, Key West, Florida

Fishing with friends

3 D movie fun, South Carolina

Wine tasting. Napa Valley, California

Giant Redwoods, Muir Woods, CA

"I do"        "I do too!"  -- 2010

Hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, California

Paris, France

Dinner celebration

Thank you all for your ever supporting thoughts, cards, well wishes and prayers.

Hugs,

Jo and Paul

"It is a mistake to look too far ahead.  Only one link of the chain of destiny can be handled at a time."

Winston Churchill

We have Closure!

Today we have closure.  The open wound that Paul came home with has official closed as of this morning.  I check it daily when I clean the J-Tube site and wound area.

 

This is a picture of the wound he was sent home with.  It measured 5 1/2 by 2 1/2 centimeters at the widest part and was approximately 2 centimeters deep.

March 23, 2013

It was a trial and error with which tape to use, most of the medical tapes, including the paper tape which the nurse highly recommended, caused Paul's skin to blister, tear away or become raw.  After finding a tape that would hold the J-Tube in place and not blister the skin, I was given permission to cut and pull the stitches from the J-Tube site.  The stitches had started to tear through the skin, pulling when he slept at night.  It has been a long process of cleaning the open wound site every other day which included cleaning the site internally and externally. Needless to say I now have proven to myself that I can do more then I ever thought possible.  Especially when the surgeon explained that I needed to remove any dead tissue from the inside of the healing wound so that it would heal correctly.

This morning it looked like this! 

May 31, 2013

I teased Paul that he now has two belly buttons.  Cleaning the J-Tube site will continue to be daily, and it is healing well.  Without the stitches pulling the skin, it is much less painful then when we arrived home two months ago.

The human body has amazing capabilities of healing itself.  The largest organ in the human body is the skin. Our skin creates a barricade that prevents harmful bacteria from hindering the body's natural operations. Openings not covered by the skin such as the nose are covered with mucus membranes that carry chemicals in the secretions that can destroy bacteria.  The human body is constantly restoring old cells with new cells that repair the damage that we create in and on the body. Our bones and muscles contain nerve fibers that grow and repair themselves. Even the liver can have as little as 25 percent of it remaining and can regenerate back into a full-size organ. 

Other updates:  The radiation effect of unpredictable vomiting has subsided dramatically over the last two days.  This is a cause of great celebration for me as I was terrified of leaving him alone because of the chocking and the bloody nose that would accompany the episodes.  Paul has actually eaten normal food today and yesterday.  Not a lot, but food nonetheless.  And it stayed down!!  His sudden onset of headaches has also diminished slightly.  It seems that the side effects of his chemo and radiation treatments are quieting down and slowly allowing him a more normal day to day life.

Paul had his Ultra Sound Endoscopy, Echo Stress Cardiogram, PET and CT Scan over the last two weeks.  We made three trips to Los Angeles and back and have one more trip coming up on June 6th, 2013.  This upcoming appointment is with the Thoracic Surgeon.  We will be discussing all the test results and date of surgery to remove the esophagus.  Paul and I are trying to write down all our questions so we can be prepared physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.  

We want to thank you all for the cards, prayers, well wishes and generous support.  The out pouring of love and caring has been tremendous.

Jo and Paul

 You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body. ~C.S. Lewis